There were three fathers-to-be in a hospital waiting room, waiting for their babies to be born.  A nurse comes in and tells the first father, “Congratulations you're the father of twins!" He says, “Great! That’s an amazing coincidence because I work for the Minnesota Twins.”  A few minutes later another nurse comes in and tells the second father, "Congratulations you're the father of triplets”! He says, "That's cool! I work for 3M."  At which point the third father gets up screams and runs out of the waiting room, down the corridor and out of the hospital clutching his head.  Just then another nurse comes in, and asks, “Where's the third father?"  One of the other fathers says, "Oh he left.”  The nurse asks, "Why?"  He replies, "He works for Seven Up!"

How good are you at waiting?  Well, waiting is something we all have to do.  Today is the beginning of Advent – the season of waiting.  So this morning I want us to think about what we are waiting for, and how we are to wait.  Because how we wait is crucial, if we are to believe the words the Jesus in today’s Gospel reading.  The ‘what for’ is quite straightforward – it’s the Return of Christ to this world.  In the few verses from Matthew 24 that we read we pick up a conversation Jesus is having with his disciples about the end of this order of things.  And in the part of the conversation we didn’t read he tells the Twelve that his return will be a definite, unmistakable, unmissable, never-to-be-repeated event that will wrap up this sad old order of pain and decay.  And this climactic and cosmic event will be preceded by other, equally confusing and troubling events.  These are to be signs that the end will come.  We then pick up the conversation with Jesus stating that no one knows when this will happen - not even Jesus himself, only God the Father.  And most people, says Jesus, will be blissfully unaware that anything untoward is about to happen.  People will be, as Jesus says, getting on with normal life - eating, drinking, working, getting married, going about their daily business, oblivious to what is about to occur.  It’ll be just like it was right before the flood in Genesis, he says.  People then were too concerned with the daily affairs of life to pay any attention to that crazy old guy and his three sons building a humungous  great boat, hundreds of miles from the sea.  Why bother about some mentally suspect man and his sailing fantasy when there’s work to be done, family to see to, hobbies to enjoy, money to be made, life to be lived?

And Jesus says that just as it was in Noah’s time, so it will be when the Son of Man returns.  It will be a surprise to those who are not prepared.  In fact, not so much a surprise, more a fatal shock.  You see just as the flood was God’s judgment upon the earth, so, says Jesus, his return will have an element of judgment about it.  Now that is a disturbing thought to modern, thinking Christians like us.  God’s meant to be all about love, isn’t he?  What’s with the judgment thing?  Well, when you think about it, it stands to reason that if God’s kingdom of justice, peace and love is to be fully established then some kind of judgment is necessary.  You see, if God is truly just and loving (as he is) then he cannot overlook the injustices of this world.  Because God is just he will come to the rescue of the victims.  Because he is love he will act to ensure the end, not just of suffering, but of the cruelty and selfishness that cause most human suffering.  And, let’s be honest - we wouldn’t want him to do anything else, would we?  “Judgment” sounds harsh, but we don’t want the arrogance, cruelty, greed, violence, abuse, and unspeakable wickedness to win.  Do we?  And part of the message of Advent is that they will not win.  The goodness and grace of God - that’s what will triumph in the final chapter history.

So, the disciples have probably understood that something cataclysmic and conclusive will happen at some point in the future.  And it’s only human to want to probe a little bit and learn when all this is going to happen.  Jesus, as we’ve noted, doesn’t, in fact can’t, give an answer to that question.  But he does do one thing, and does it very well.  He tells them to wait.  But that’s not all.  They are not to wait like I do in the post office or the doctor’s office - getting irrtitated, pacing around and dreaming up violent retribution on the people causing my delay.  You see Jesus explains at the end of today’s reading, that the manner of their waiting is crucial.  The followers of Jesus are to get ready.  They are to be prepared, because in theory, these earth-shattering events could happen at any moment.  So, the Twelve are to live their lives in a constant state of readiness. 

One day the Pope was sitting in the Vatican reading the newspaper, when, out of breath, in rushes one of his cardinals and calls out it a panic-stricken voice.  “Papa, papa.  Down in the square, it’s Jesus - he’s returned.  What should we do?”  And the pope says “look busy”.

Jesus says, in effect, don’t just kick back and snooze.  He says, get ready, be prepared, don’t get caught off guard, like those people who met a soggy end when the flood came.  If Jesus were teaching in the US today, rather than Israel 2000 years ago, he might tell the parable of the Floridian who didn’t listen to the weather forecast in September.  One morning he notices his neighbours boarding up their houses.  The local shopkeepers are pulling down the steel shutters over the windows and putting the ‘closed’ signs on the doors.  Next door they’ve loaded up the minivan with bottles of water, lunchboxes and luggage, and are heading towards the Interstate.  Refusing to let all this distract him, our friend goes back inside to prepare dinner and read Golf Digest.  And then, the following morning the skies turn a deep and threatening slate, and that sea-breeze he’d appreciated on his early morning walk, turns steadily from brisk to Category 5 devastation.  The parable of the Floridian in September who thought he had better things to do than listen to the weather forecast.  You can make up your own ending.

But, of course, Jesus never went to Florida, and knew nothing of hurricanes.  So, he tells a parable, to illustrate the same point, about a homeowner who receives a visit one night from burglar.  And Jesus says that if he had known that he was going to be burgled and what time it was going to happen he’d have stayed up and been ready when the thief arrived.  Maybe sitting on the flat roof of the house (by the way digging through the thin, plaster roof was the suggested method of gaining access, as recommended by the Jerusalem Union of Housebreakers.)

There’s a difference between watching and being prepared.  Take the response of a cat and a dog when you walk through the front door.  Both of them watch, but only the dog is prepared to do something.

I think we all get the point clearly enough - be ready.  Live your life in such a way that you wouldn’t feel embarrassed if Jesus were to return this afternoon.  That’s what it means to be ready.  What would you want Christ to find you doing when he returns?  What words would you want him to hear coming out of your mouth?  What thoughts would you want him to discern in your mind?  What motives would you want him to detect in your heart?  Because let’s be clear - he might come this afternoon!  But even if he doesn’t, he’s going to come at some point in my life - either in the cataclysmic Second Coming that we’re thinking about this morning, or he will come for me individually and call me home through death.  One way or the other he’s coming.  And what will he find when he arrives?  I hope he finds me ready and prepared. 

Struggling to see what this can mean practically?  Well let me briefly mention four ways in which I think we can be ready for the return of Christ.

1          Keep short accounts with God.  I think it is a necessary discipline to go to God and confess our sins.  Not sins from years ago, just those we’ve committed since the last time we confessed.  All those other ones are dealt with - forgiven and done away with.  Daily receive his forgiveness and let it free you up to enjoy your relationship with God.

2          Keep short accounts with other people.  If you’re out of sorts with someone else - go to them.  Apologise, ask for forgiveness.  Give forgiveness.  Be reconciled.  If it is not possible, for whatever reason, to go to the person directly, then do that forgiving and letting go in your heart, and in prayer.  Paul says “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger, and don't give the devil a foothold.”  Clear it up straight away.  Keep your account short, and tear up the accounts of other people.

3          Don’t get too distracted by this life.  We live in crazy times - all those timesaving devices that were going to transform our lives and free up hours a day in which we could relax and be with family and friends?  What happened to that?  Everything needs our attention, everyone needs something from us, no wonder that when we do get the chance to rest we either fall asleep or feel no motivation to pick up a Bible and spend some time with God.  Our society has a collective ADHD.  So how difficult is it but, how important is it that we stay focussed on the true prize - a life lived with God.  Keep the main thing the main thing.

4          And finally, invest yourself in things that will last and will make a positive and lasting difference - even if no one else notices.  Perform random acts of kindness and service.  It doesn’t matter what, and for whom.  The truth is you’re doing to Jesus in disguise.  What a thrill it would be for Christ to return and find you doing something for someone else, or sharing your faith with a workmate who is not a Christian, or listening to a friend who is in pain and is needing your support and encouragement.  I’m sure that the heart of Jesus would swell with gratitude and pride as he looked at you doing these things.  And he would surely utter those words in the next chapter of Matthew ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father; take your inheritance, the kingdom prepared for you since the creation of the world.’

Let me finish with the true story of Sir Ernest Shackleton, one of the greatest figures of the Golden Age of Antarctic Exploration.   Shackleton's most famous expedition was an attempt to cross Antarctica from the Weddell Sea south of the Atlantic, to the Ross Sea south of the Pacific, by way of the South Pole. He set out from London on 1 August 1914, and reached the Weddell Sea on January 10, 1915, where pack ice enveloped his ship, the Endurance. The ship was smashed to pieces by the ice on 27 October. The 28 crewmembers managed to flee to Elephant Island, in three small boats. Shackleton and five other men managed to reach the southern coast of South Georgia in one of the small boats.  In time Shackleton managed hitch a ride on a ship of the Chilean navy and this vessel made its way to Elephant Island, to seek the remainder of Shackleton’s crew.  On August 30, 1916, 337 days after the shipwreck, in the middle of the Antarctic winter, Shackleton found his entire crew not only alive and well, but prepared to get on board. After the excitement died down, Shackleton asked his men how it was that they were ready to get aboard so promptly.  His second in command replied that every morning he had rolled up his sleeping bag, and called out to the men, “Get your things ready, boys, the boss may come today.”